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Dublin Guys Journey

234 posts, 0 answered
  1. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    07 Mar
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    Day 91
    Thanks to all for your kind and lovely comments. I'm so proud of myself for this journey and how far I've gotten. I think this is the furthest I've gotten into a quit before. Still using the mist but I guess that's ok as it does no harm.
    Smoking is no longer on my mind now so I guess 3 months was a huge milestone for me... now to get to 100 days and then onwards to 4 months like fisherguy. It really feels like I'm free from the ball and chain smoking was. Life stresses are still there but I'm now a non smoker and am finding other ways of dealing with things.

    Had to pay my rent again today but I get paid again Thursday so not long to wait to see the balance go up again. Met my friend yesterday again and I was able to pay for two pizzas to celebrate. He gave up smoking and drinking this time last year so it was nice to chat with him about it all. And we watched some episodes of south park while having the pizza so it was just a lovely relaxing evening.

    Seriously thinking of cutting back on the drinking now as well... but I'll take my time with that one. Im not drinking anything like what I used to as a smoker. Amazing how life changes when we give up. Still looking up places to rent but its depressing.... so expensive and so few nice places.... so I reckon Ill stay put where I am and wait for the right place to come up. Oh to be able to buy my own place..

    I'm probably going to start posting less often now as I feel a new chapter on this journey has started for me and it's less of a struggle now with not smoking. I went from being a basket case and nearly falling many times looking for help to now having my head held high thinking that I have beaten this addiction..... finally. I know its still going to be a challenge to remain smoke free but I feel the worst is behind me now and I can close the book on it. Smoking just isn't an option anymore and the quit means too much now to ever go back.
    Im still gonna lurk around and read other peoples journies and offer help to others where I can. And will post if anything happens and when I reach the milestones. This forum was such a big factor in this quit process Ill never forget and always be thankful. If I feel myself getting tempted or a bit weak again I will go and get the low dose patches.
    Last modified on 08 Mar 2022 08:22 by dublinguy
  2. mari_m
    mari_m avatar
    90 posts
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    03 Jan 2019
    07 Mar
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    Hey Dublin Guy, 
         Its so nice to hear you are doing well in your quit, congrats on 3 months! It is so rewarding to read about everyones journey, and helps to keep me on track.I tried to quit lots of times over the years, and managed to be successful for 18 months way back, but couldn't stay quit. Now I am not doing it alone, and no-one is judgemental, just so supportive. Thanks for sharing, and heres a big pat on the back!! All the hard work does pay off
  3. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    08 Mar in reply to mari_m
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    Day 92.
    Thanks mari_m. 18 months was incredible... you will be back there in no time again. Just have to stay the course. You hit the nail on the head there. Getting to 3 months is great I know and things really do get better after that... but its just that effort that's needed to stay quit and keep with it. Id love to be one of those people that can have a smoke when they drink or when out socialising with friends... but that pack a day habit is always going to be there for me and I just cant have the odd one here and there.
    The good news is Im feeling a lot better in myself. Little things don't annoy me anymore. People don't get on my nerves like they used to. I am bored a lot of the time though and that's a challenge cos in the past as a smoker, that's when I would smoke. Im determinded this time to make this quit be the one that sticks. Ive too many people invested in my quit now to give up and I don't want to let anyone down.. least of all myself.

    If Im still feeling a bit weak after 100 days Im going to go back on the patch for a few weeks and tell no one. That's much better than being a pack a day smoker again. The dashboard is saying I haven't spent €1350 on cigarettes so that keeps me focussed. Theres my summer vacation right there. We have to focus on all the good things and stop romanticising the cigarette. Man was I addicted. Now that I'm finished with the patches I'm more or less doing this cold turkey now so hence why I'm feeling a bit 'uncomfortable'. I have the mist and that helps.
    Last modified on 08 Mar 2022 08:25 by dublinguy
  4. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
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    09 Mar in reply to dublinguy
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    Day 93
    Just bought another mist spray. Was not going to after the last one but when it was gone I was feeling a bit on edge again. I'm going to wait till I get to 100 days at least before I start giving up on the mist. I suppose its keeping me from buying a pack so its not a bad thing but has anyone here who used the mist any advice on stopping it? I reckon Im using a spray a week now which is ok.
    Nothing major really to report only boredom. This old job is grand but the new office manager has all these 'ideas' and hes very forward and cheeky... so too is the new complaints manager. I guess Im still, even this far into the quit a bit irritable and its that 'leave me alone..go away' attitude that I know is typical in a quit journey.

    I have given up on the idea of renting a place on my own. The expense at the moment is just insane and they say on the adds to only email them don't call... but then they never get back to you. Ill stay put where I am and keep saving as much as I can. IF I could give up the alcohol and the mist spray Id be saving even more... only spending on food. I ran up a huge dept a few years ago that Ive been paying back each month since...So with the money I save on smoking over the next few months I will use to pay it off. Maybe by this time next year Ill be in a much better place financially. Its funny how when I smoked I never cared about any of this stuff and now that Ive stopped its like Ive got my thinking cap back on and thinking clearly.

    Oh to go back to that 16 year old me and shake some sense into myself. I must have drove my parents crazy all those years.

    Anyone else find that when they got this far into the quit journey? your whole outlook on life changes and you start to get real about things.

    I was gonna stop posting on here now that Im this far in but its become part of my routine to write something here everyday and like the mist, Im not ready to let go of that yet. Next Wednesday will be 100 days so for now Im just gonna try hang on and get to that milestone.
    Last modified on 09 Mar 2022 07:45 by dublinguy
  5. jenna lee, quit coach
    jenna lee, quit coach avatar
    265 posts
    Registered:
    28 Jun 2018
    09 Mar in reply to dublinguy
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    Hi dublinguy,

    Congratulations on making the decision to continue with NRT, rather than going back to smoking. Generally, you may use these products up to 6 months after quitting, after which we advise to speak with a healthcare provider for longer use.

    If you feel the need to use the spray for cravings, please don't hesitate to do so. If you are concerned about your use, what are some other ways you can manage cravings? You may also choose to use the spray as needed, or consistently throughout the day; whichever works better for you.

    Thank you for sharing your quit journey and for supporting our other community members. We enjoy reading your experiences. Your impact is recognized.

    Best,

    Jenna Lee
  6. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
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    09 Dec 2021
    10 Mar
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    Day 94
    Finding it tough today. Not so much urges to smoke but just a bit restless, uncomfortable. I saw a group of people smoking outside and past them by thinking 'thank god that's not you anymore'. Ive been doing the maths and if I keep going to plan, that loan I have will be gone in a few months. Im gonna wait to see the balance in my savings rise up above it and then just pay more and more off it as I can. If I want to go about a mortgage Ill need 6 month savings so I have to be careful.
    A friend asked if I wanted to go for drinks after work today but Im not going. Last week I nearly died on Friday in work after going out the night before and when I got the smell of smoking when I was a bit merry I felt a bit shaky and knowing I could ask for one.... Im not going there with 'the one' this quit. This quit is the forever one and Im going to go the full distance. Till now the target was to get to 3 months and now Ive achieved that I need to set bigger goals.. like 6 months and a year. I hope Im not still on here 6 months in moaning about urges and cravings... Ive gotten some time off work next wednesday to head home to my parents again for another break. Looking forward to that. That will also mark my 100 days milestone.

    Thanks Jenna Lee for the advice. I'm going to continue getting the mist for a while cos it does help... especially on days like today. They are expensive but still cheaper than buying a pack of smokes everyday. I don't know if I need the nicotine hit or I just have the habit of it now but its getting me through so I'll keep using it.
    Last modified on 10 Mar 2022 09:41 by dublinguy
  7. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
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    09 Dec 2021
    11 Mar
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    Day 95.
    Bit better today. I just bought a 4 pack of the lozenges fruit flavour. The mist is good but I'm going through them too quickly lately and they're quite expensive at €30 a cartridge. The 4 pack of lozenges were €25. Will give em a go and see if I can stop using the mist and use them instead. Ideally I want to stop all the NRT but Ill use these for the next week or so and see how I'm feeling. Happy Friday everyone... the weeks seem to be flying by lately. Have plans to meet up with a buddy tomorrow for some lunch and a few drinks. This is the buddy that still smokes but I know I'll be alright around him cos the desire to smoke is gone and now I have the spray and the lozenges to help me.

    Just finished one of the lozenges there. Not bad and the cravings are gone. They say 4mg per lozenge as opposed to the 1mg per squirt of the spray. I don't think I will need to use the lozenges as often as I'm using the spray. Nice little experiment for myself over the next week.
    I tried the gum in a past quit and it just wasn't for me.. hated the taste of it.

    (later at home).. opened a drawer here in the house and saw a pack of smokes belong to one of the guys that lives here. I had a look at the smokes and then closed the drawer again. Im not even tempted to have one. So now I know Im definitely getting better with this. Sure I could have 'one'... but do I really want to? Hell no. 
    Last modified on 11 Mar 2022 12:59 by dublinguy
  8. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
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    14 Mar
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    Day 98
    So happy to on day 98. Just back in work now again after the weekend. Met up with the buddy that still smokes on Saturday. He had to go out to have one 4 times and the stench when he came back after each one was so awful. He had the pack on the table and I must admit, I was tempted but I didn't do it. And I used to smoke a lot more than him.
    Today I'm going to get another spray mist cos the last one is gone again. Ill need it for in the car drive down home on Wednesday. Haven't used the lozenges at all but I know they are there if I need them. I saw on the jobs website for where I work they have the position I was doing up again and this time its permanent. Not going for it though. Bad and all as the job I'm doing now is, its less stress than that other one was and that was tough when quitting.
    Having gotten this far into this quit this time is really making me reflect on the journey so far. I've read back over this thread so many times and it really helps me to just keep on the path with NOPE. This was hard but I'm feeling it a lot less difficult now. So proud of myself and looking forward to my time off on Wednesday.
    Last modified on 14 Mar 2022 07:22 by dublinguy
  9. treepeo1
    treepeo1 avatar
    244 posts
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    15 Mar in reply to dublinguy
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    Hey dublinguy,

    I love your last two posts.  First, you saw that pack of smokes and closed the drawer again.  You CHOSE not to smoke.  That is what is so wonderful.  You had a choice and you decided to remain a non-smoker.  Good for you!

    Secondly, while out with your buddy, he reeked every time he came back from having a smoke.  The stench coming off of smokers is enough to make you gag, isn't it?  OMG, that is how we smelled, too.  How embarrassing.  I don't know how my non-smoking family and friends put up with me.  Smokers really do reek.

    You are going to get to a point where you don't even consider making a choice.  You just carry on being a non-smoker, full stop.  

    I read a really interesting little post on the internet today.  It said, "In six months you can be full of excuses, or full of progress."  Pretty profound, eh?
  10. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    15 Mar in reply to treepeo1
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    Day 99
    Yes Treepeo1, that did feel good to close the drawer when I saw the full pack. My landlord smokes the odd one now and then and before he would ask me for one but now I don't smoke I guess he got his own stash. A month or two ago I would definitely have sneaked one. But now at this stage in the quit, I guess I'm just that bit stronger and was able to resist.
    When my friend came back in from smoking I nearly gagged. I couldn't believe the stench and as I said, I used smoke nearly twice as much as him before. The same guy made me laugh because I mentioned Im this far into the quit and he said 'I know.. u have told me in every text you sent me this last while that you quit'. I laughed at that cos its true. I suppose I was trying to drop a hint that he could quit too... but he has to do it in his own time.

    I glad you replied cos the boards have been a bit quiet this last week and I was thinking.. 'ok you're this far in now are people just sick of hearing about it?'. I haven't much to say about it anymore to be honest but I keep coming back and reading old threads and posts about reaching the milestones. 99 days today. I can't believe it.

    In the past when I got to 2 months, the urges would get the best of me and I would go out and buy a pack thinking I could just smoke a few and be fine. But that sadly wasn't the case. So this time Im holding strong and Im not going to buy a pack to have to drown it or give it away. I am done. Now its like atp said in a few posts.. its about learning how to be a non smoker... I was a non smoker for the first 16 years of my life so I know I can do this. I haven't bought any reward asuch, just some clothes ... but my plan is to use the money I haven't spent on cigarettes to pay off that stupid loan I foolishly took out. It was meant to be for a car but I didn't get the car and instead blew the money on holidays, partying and moving houses a few times. It will be so nice to get rid of it.

    Last modified on 15 Mar 2022 08:59 by dublinguy
  11. treepeo1
    treepeo1 avatar
    244 posts
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    16 Mar in reply to dublinguy
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    Yes dublinguy, atp is absolutely right.  You have to learn how to be a non-smoker.  It is a process we all go through.  I'm sure at times it seems a bit unnatural to you, but over time it will be something you no longer think about.   

    Congrats on your 99 days.  WooHoo!
  12. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
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    09 Dec 2021
    21 Mar
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    Day 105
    Back in Dublin again now at work after my short break down home for St Patricks Weekend. I've definitely turned a corner on this journey now as smoking is getting further and further from my mind. No urges or cravings but just the odd thought about it now and then. We went to a local parade with my nephew and there were people smoking on the street but it didn't bother me at all. Bought a new jumper to keep me warm. So happy with the way things have turned out so well. No way will I go back now - just have to keep on this new road Ive gone down and keep saying NOPE.

    I still have the mist but really only use it at work or when driving. At home I don't seem to need it at all and Im not drinking as much alcohol now either which is all good news. I joined some quitters groups on facebook just to hear peoples stories and to keep myself alert that quitting is not easy and I cant become complacent now this far in. Keep on going. Some of my friends are talking about holidays now so definitely a holiday somewhere in the sun is in the plan for this year. With the money Ive saved I can afford it. :)
    Last modified on 21 Mar 2022 11:38 by dublinguy
  13. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
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    22 Mar in reply to dublinguy
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    Well, for some unknown reason I'm getting cravings today. But I'm almost laughing at them as opposed to being irritated and edgy. Bought another spray mist to help. The lozenges are too strong and I end up having to spit them out after a bit. I think the ones I got are too strong for me at this stage. The mist helps me get through the day.
    The good news is I have made plans to go on holidays this year. One with a mate from back home in September to Gran Canaria. And somewhere else with another mate from here in Dublin between now and then. With the money I've saved I can well afford two holidays and why the hell not. I cant wait to experience what Treepeo did going through the airport as a new non smoker.
    Each time I get a craving or urge now I just remind myself of how difficult this journey was at the start and how hard I've worked to get to now. I recall the heartburn and throwing up in the evenings... the headaches, the irritability... the 'needing' a smoke - all of that has gone now and no way do I want to go through that again.

    I found the series Lost online so I'm gonna watch that over the next while. I was watching ER but it got a bit boring. My attention span is a bit off at the moment but I feel like I've entered a new stage of this process now... the one where you begin to see not smoking as 'normal' and learning how to be a non smoker. This quit was the one to end all quits and I really don't think I have it in me to start over a new quit again and go through everything yet another time. Have to become my own best friend and be kind to myself... the holidays will help with that.
  14. susanm
    susanm avatar
    71 posts
    Registered:
    16 Jul 2018
    23 Mar
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    Dublinguy you are a real inspiration to me!! Congratulations on getting so far in your quit. I am on day 51 and doing okay today, so far. It helps coming here and reading the different posts. I also joined a Facebook group last night to help keep me on track. I want to make this time successful and be a non-smoker for the rest of my life. I have treated myself to some new pencil crayons for my colouring as that is helping keep my hand busy. 
    I think planning a couple of holidays is wonderful!! You deserve to treat yourself for quitting! Please keep posting!
  15. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    24 Mar in reply to susanm
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    Day 108
    Thanks Susanm. It really makes me feel good to think my posts and this thread is a help to others as well as myself. Theres something about feeling accountable that keeps me coming back. If this ends up the longest thread on this forum, so be it. I like reading back over it to see how far I've come and compare where I am now in the journey to where I was; with the cravings and the urges and all that. And when Im done reading this, I read over other peoples threads and comment there if I have any opinion. Its a great distraction and keeps me busy. I think that's one of the keys to success... keep distracting yourself from the thoughts of smoking.

    Yesterday and the day before I was getting urges all day in work; I think it was down to boredom. I went to the shop yesterday evening to pick up some beers cos the day was very nice outside and there's something nice about having a beer on a sunny day that I enjoy. Going into the shop I saw a guy putting out a cigarette and I was thinking... 'oh just to have the one'... but then the same guy was in front of me in the queue to pay and the stench... I was soon thinking 'no way to just the one... I don't wanna smell like that ever again'.

    I've made plans with a friend to head to Powerscourt Gardens this weekend. That's a lovely big house with landscape gardens that's open to the public here in Co.Wicklow. And the weather is meant to be good so it will be a nice day. It will be my first visit as a non smoker so I'm really looking forward to sitting on the terrace having a glass of wine and a bite to eat. I love making plans like that for weekends cos it can be tough being stuck inside if the cravings and urges strike.

    I feel Im losing track of the days now; I have to check the counter on the dashboard. I know on April 6th I'll be at 4 months. Maybe, just maybe, this time I really have done it. I know Im still using the mist so Im, not 100% clear of nicotine yet but I will get there. The mist gives me acid reflux at times if I swallow it too fast. That happened yesterday when I left the house to go to the shop for the beers.. I thought I was going to throw up. But it passed.
    I will say the mist is better than the lozenges though. I think Ill end up giving the lozenges I got away to someone because the ones I got are too strong. I only need a low dose nicotine hit now.... so that's progress.

    Onwards and upwards. Gonna stick with this now. I love being a non smoker.
  16. susanm
    susanm avatar
    71 posts
    Registered:
    16 Jul 2018
    24 Mar in reply to dublinguy
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    Hi Dublinguy, I understand how the smell can get to you. I walked through a bunch of people smoking today and gagged. 

    It sounds like you have a lovely weekend planned. I hope you enjoy yourself. We are in for a cold, rainy weekend so I will be staying inside. I never smoked in the house so it won't be too hard for me. I think that is one off the good things to come from this as well. No having to go outside in the snow or rain. I am going to go on a few virtual tours around the world to help keep me busy. Today I went to the Keukenhoff Garden in the Netherlands and didn't have to leave my couch.

    You are definitely a non smoker! 
  17. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
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    27 Mar
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    Day 111
    Powerscourt was lovely yesterday in the sun and while having some lunch on the terrace I noticed of the 100 people there or so, no one was smoking. not one! I never saw how unsocial smoking is these days. I got through the day fine again... the days are getting easier now and Im not thinking of smoking anywhere like what used to. The longing to have the one is gone. The thought and habit of buying a pack... gone. So now I think Im gonna give up the mist and see how I go. Just finished the last of one just now and Im gonna try see if I can make it the day without it. Small steps definitely was the way to go with this quit. 
    Bought more shorts and t-shirts yesterday as well to prepare for my holiday in september. Its great to have things to look forward to. 
  18. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
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    28 Mar
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    Day 112
    Well so much for giving up the mist. I came into work and just felt I needed the spray so I went and bought a double pack. That should last me 2 weeks. I don't seem to need it at home but its handy to have it on the side at work. Maybe its the good weather we are having or maybe its the dopamine levels in my brain returning to normal but Im finding I have moments of feeling extremely happy this last week or so. Like excited about my life now and upcoming holidays and so on. I haven't experienced anything like that in a very long time and its very welcome. I went to a bar yesterday with my landlord and the two dogs and we sat outside in the sun having a few beers. It was lovely. There were smokers at the next table but it didn't bother me at all.

    I have to pinch myself sometimes to believe Ive come so far in this quit and managed to keep with it. I think the good weather helps - when its wet and cold its easy to feel down and then look to smoke for the comfort that I once believed it used to bring me. I heard Tina Turners song 'When the heartache is over' on the radio and it made me laugh because it was like she was singing about breaking up the relationship with smoking. 'I know I wont be missing you'.... that's exactly what its like. It almost like I'm breaking free of a bad relationship that was holding me down for years. No more. This quit is so precious to me now and I can see the 4 month flag on the horizon and 6 months beyond that. I'm still watching the series Lost and even though I saw it before I'm really enjoying it. Did anyone else experience this this far in? Feeling excited about life and 'happy'?

    I'm reading old threads on here and relating so much to what people are talking about. It seems we all travel a very similar path. Im nearly in love with some of the posters. lol... but the progress and success stories really help keep the motivation. I saw on the SHL facebook page that they are celebrating 20 years in business... what a lifeline it is. We have a website here in Ireland called Quit.ie but its nowhere near as effective as reading on here... I love it.

    I really am believing now that I will never smoke again... the idea of it is foreign to me now and I've my eye on the tracker that makes me feel better about the whole thing.

    forgot to mention - the friend who still smokes that I met last week... didn't he go and get covid. Poor guy... nothing serious but hes had to self isolate for a week. Same with a girl in work - she went to the uk for a holiday and came back with covid and is out sick now for 2 weeks.They have lifted the restrictions here now but its still out there.. be careful everyone.
    Last modified on 28 Mar 2022 05:56 by dublinguy
  19. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    29 Mar in reply to dublinguy
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    Day 113
    Was very bold yesterday and drank 2 bottles of wine. I had one left over from Saturday that I didn't drink so I opened it up yesterday after work, listening to songs on youtube and messing online with mates on whatsapp.
    Then after the first I wanted more so went and got a second bottle. The good news I didn't get any urges.

    This time last year I was doing that every night and smoking at least a pack. How I did that is now a mystery to me... dying in work here. never again. Got good news from the friend I'm going on holiday with in September.. hes decided to quit after hearing my success and wants it to be a smoke free holiday and an easy flight. It makes me smile to think that seeing me do it is making him wanna follow. I told him get the patches and the mist but hes trying to do it cold turkey. I wont overwhelm him with texts of 'hows it going...' cos if someone had done that6 to me at the start I would have bit their head off.
  20. treepeo1
    treepeo1 avatar
    244 posts
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    29 Mar in reply to dublinguy
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    Hi dublinguy,

    It is socially unacceptable to smoke nowadays, that's for sure.  Non-smokers are now in the majority, and our numbers are growing every day.  I've been on numerous tours since I quit, and not one person on any of my tours smoked.  Ironically, when I still smoked, I was the only person who smoked.  It was embarrassing.

    Now you are starting to appreciate the freedom that comes with being a non-smoker.  You no longer have to leave your friends in the middle of a conversation to go outside to light up.  You don't have to worry about inclement weather because you can stay tucked inside.  And your poor friend who has covid and has to isolate.  Does he have enough smokes to get him through his quarantine?  That's another thing you don't have to worry about.  And also, God forbid any of us get covid, but we have a much better chance of healing as non-smokers, so there is that to consider as well.

    You are an inspiration to people on this site, dublinguy.  That should make you feel great.  Keep up the good work.  You are rocking your quit!  WooHoo!
  21. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    30 Mar in reply to treepeo1
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    Day 114
    Its so true Treepeo. Only one friend of mines smokes now - the one with the covid. I'm sure hes' fine for smokes cos he buys cartons from people who go abroad and bring them back. He has to go for another test Thursday to see if he's still positive. My other friend back home is in the process of giving them up. I asked him last night how it was going and the response... 'please don't mention smoking again for a while'... Guess I just have to be there and not push it.
    Last night when I was in bed I was thinking back over these last 4 months and this journey that I've been on. Almost like seeing the 4 month flag on the horizon has made me pause and reflect. Its taken till now or at least this last week or two, to feel that I really just don't want to smoke anymore. And I get bouts of good humour that I haven't experienced in years. The first month was the worst... getting sick every night, feeling restless and cranky and crawling the walls to smoke. So many triggers. Now I look back at that and think why on earth would anyone in their right mind want to go back and repeat all that again. Just no way. I don't think I have the strength to get through it another time. Thankfully that has all stopped now. Im in bed most evenings by 9 and sleep right through till 7am.
    When I started, money was the main incentive to quit. I was sick to death of living pay cheque to pay cheque. Now, while the money Ive saved is great, Im more focussed on the health benefits.. Breathing better, looking better, better mood, not cranky or depressed. I think cigarettes were depressing me and keeping me locked in a poor mental state. Now Im on the social media apps trying to meet new people and make new friends. I never had the energy or the motive to do that before. When I look back at myself this time last year... stopping at the shop every evening for a pack of smokes and 2 bottles of wine - what was I thinking... and we were in lockdown so the mental health took a bashing. Now, Im like a world away from that. I still drink but its not the same kind of drinking. And certainly not excessive like it was. So everything has gotten better.

    At this stage now its just a matter of staying quit. I do get the odd urge/craving now and then but now I just laugh when that happens... in the first month they used to make me wanna have a cry or curl up in a bawl in bed.
    This was hard... I wont sugar coat it. This forum really helped in ways I cant even find words to explain. It helps that everyone understands and you can read peoples stories and see that you're not alone.

    Im still using the mist and my friend back home is going to start using it too. So Im still getting a small bit of nicotine but I know its only a small amount and it does help. And I love reading back over this thread to see where I was and how good I feel now.

    Deciding to quit was one of the best things I've ever done for myself and Im really proud that I managed to commit to it this time. Its so true - the patches and the mist helped but it was me who had to decide that I just didn't want to smoke anymore and then to put the head down and just battle my way through each day, each hour, each minute at a time.

    To anyone reading this starting out - my heart goes out to you. This is probably one of the hardest things you will ever try get through but the rewards on the other end when you finally break free are so worth it. You get your life back.

    Music helps too... Im tempted to make a playlist and call it 'the no smoking vibe'.. Whitney Houstons 'Step by Step' and Tina Turner 'When the heartache is over' are two songs that helped me.

    Forgot to mention while I was out yesterday at work I ran into the girl that gave me the cigarette on day 65. Hadnt spoken to her since then. The difference this time. I was able to stand and chat to her while she smoked and I didn't have any urges or desire to ask for one. I think I'm out of the dangerzone tunnel now. Onwards and upwards.

    Ps: no idea why the font on this post was bolded.. computer glitch.

    Last modified on 30 Mar 2022 05:09 by dublinguy
  22. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    31 Mar
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    Day 115
    Well I was bold yesterday again and got 2 more bottles of wine, but it made me sick. So I guess that's another lesson learned. No wine on school nights - 1 bottle is never enough. Back to the fat frogs I go cos I can only drink a certain amount of those.
    Still going through a 'good mood' phase which I'm really happy about. I don't even think about smoking now when I'm at home. In work I do think of it but I'm not getting cravings or urges at all. Somewhere along the path that just stopped and it really does feel like 'freedom'.

    I know from past attempts though that I can't get complacent or too confident with this cos That's where I relapsed in the past. I think I did manage about 6 months about 10 years ago and exam stress lead me back down the slippery slope. I don't have that kind of problem now and the job I'm doing isn't too stressful either so this time I have no excuses. Cant believe in 2 months time Ill be 6 months quit... half the year will be gone already.

    I've been reading old threads here to keep me distracted when Im not busy at work. I wonder where all those people are now.. I bet as a quit coach here you see many folks come and go through the years. I reckon Ill be still logging in for a long time to come cos I love it here. Wouldn't it be great if we all met up and had a big party to celebrate our quits... lol.
  23. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    01 Apr
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    Day 116
    4 months coming up fast next Wednesday. I'm so excited about that. Today Im going for drinks with a mate after work. Last time I went I got urges to smoke and the spray and the beer didn't mesh well and I got sick. Hopefully that wont happen today... so embarrassing.
    Last modified on 01 Apr 2022 06:46 by dublinguy
  24. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    02 Apr
    Link to this post
    Day 117
    Well I survived my night out without any cigarettes. Felt different this time there and I didnt feel any urges. Could smell stale cigarette smoke off some people and it made me want to gag. 
    Dropped my bank card outside when I got home and thought Id lost them so had to cancel them... only to find them then again. Grrr... that would have been a disaster if I were still smoking and needing to buy smokes everyday. Takes about a week to get a new card. 

    Gonna be moving house soon. Its just not working out where I living at the moment... so Im on the lookout for a new home. The joys. 
  25. freedomchild
    freedomchild avatar
    42 posts
    Registered:
    18 Jan 2022
    02 Apr
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    Good for you. for staying strong. You can do it.. 4 months coming up soon.  You should feel proud of that. You should treat yourself, you deserve it.
  26. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    03 Apr
    Link to this post
    Day 118
    Great to hear from you Freedomchild. Was wondering where you were and how things were going and Im glad to hear you are still going strong. Just chilling here at home emailing non stop about trying to find a new place to live. Havent been happy where Im living for a while so it was bound to happen. Moving is so stressful but its tough to find a place in dublin at the moment. You email people and they dont even bother getting back to you. I have 3 weeks to find a place.. fingers crossed. Thanks to not smoking at least I have the money good to go with the deposit and one months rent. Whatever happens or however stressed I get, I will not smoke again. 

    Last modified on 03 Apr 2022 14:52 by dublinguy
  27. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    04 Apr
    Link to this post
    Day 119
    Feeling really stressed today. Several rooms I thought were a sure thing have all come back saying they are already taken... and a bunch of others I've applied about, didn't get back to me. Beginning to panic which I know isn't doing me any favours. I will get through this without a smoke. I'd feel so crap if I smoked now. I think this is the biggest test I had since starting this journey. Kicked out all over spilled water. Did you ever hear the like. If by the end of the week I still haven't found anything I'm going to have to beg to be able to stay where I am. I have the mist to help.... thank God I bought that dual pack last week.

    (Later at home).. sorted things out with my landlord. I explained how difficult it is right now to find a place/a room and they agreed to let me stay provided I dont drink warm wine and fat frogs ever again. The relief. I was so stressed and sick with worry today over it all. Lesson learned. And Im still off the smokes. Its amazing I got through today without caving in. 
    Last modified on 04 Apr 2022 14:04 by dublinguy
  28. jenna lee, quit coach
    jenna lee, quit coach avatar
    265 posts
    Registered:
    28 Jun 2018
    04 Apr in reply to dublinguy
    Link to this post
    Agreed dublinguy,

    You are going through something difficult and most people in your situation would feel as you do. You should be very proud of yourself for using the mist rather than going back to smoking. You are so strong and your narratives prove that.

    All the best in your continued quit attempt, and in finding a residence,

    Jenna Lee
  29. dublinguy
    dublinguy avatar
    289 posts
    Registered:
    09 Dec 2021
    05 Apr
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    Day 120
    Well here I am, a day off 4 months and feeling great. Luckily the living situation resolved itself by just apologising and saying I wont drink warm wine and fat frogs together again. I just cant tolerate that level of alcohol anymore because of not smoking. Not a bad thing, I just have to learn how to drink more responsibly.. at 41 its about time I learned. I was very lucky they agreed to let me stay. I could have been living in my car for a while. At the moment its impossible to find a room... the demand far out numbers the supply. You nearly have to know people to get anywhere. I spent the best part of 2 days non stop applying and didn't even get a reply... just 'the rooms is already gone' or 'ill call you if a room comes available'. I had no idea it was so tough at the moment... and now we have Ukrainians coming here too to add to the issue. Moving again would have cost me a fortune and Id have lost money again between deposits and what not. The joys. Have to focus on saving and getting my own place so I don't have to worry about it again.

    Heading home next Saturday for a week down home for Easter. That will be it then for a few months till my holiday in September.. although Ill probably take a long weekend round my birthday in May.

    Now that Ive reached 4 months Im going to stop counting the days. Now its counting the months. Never in my wildest dreams when starting this journey did I think I would get to here. Cheers fisherguy.. we've done it. You just have to take it one day at a time and hang on. After the 3rd month the cravings started to lose their strength. I now get the odd thought here and there that it would be nice to have one; but now I know better and am able to ignore those thoughts when and if they happen.

    In terms of symptoms of withdrawal... all but gone. I still get a bit of acid reflux at night but I think that could be from the mist if I use it too close to sleeping time. and the mucus from my nose is still blood stained. If that doesn't stop Ill ask my doctor the next time I see them if that's normal. Other than that things are going really good. Went for a short walk again today over lunch and I noticed that Im not gasping for air anymore when I have to go up a hill.


    Last modified on 05 Apr 2022 10:05 by dublinguy
  30. Fisher Guy
    Fisher Guy avatar
    40 posts
    Registered:
    01 Dec 2021
    05 Apr
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    Congratulationa  on your 4 months. Knowing the hardship and effort it took  for you and everyone it  a great accomplishment. Now on to month 6, that is what I am looking forward to. We can do this . Glad you  don't have to move. It can be stressful. stay safe and smoke free. Kepp telling people nope.
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