jene
14 posts
Registered:
21 Mar 2023
26 Mar 2023
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And so begins a new chapter, once again.
Last night I smoked my last cigarettes, and look forward to embracing my life and freedom today in an even greater way. The week ahead will be easy, because I never smoke during the week anyways, but the weekend will come, and with that, the thoughts and cravings also. So I promised myself I would write a letter to myself, and when those cravings come, before taking any action whatsoever, to sit down an read it, and then try to redirect my actions.
Posting it here, helps everything solidify for me, and knowing others might have seen it, also helps me stay accountable outside myself. So here is my list, which is likely to grow longer...
When Cravings Come...
- Listen to "Chalk Outlines" by Ren...sing with it, feel it deeply and move your body
- Remember the immediate regret that will come, the moment you arrive home with a pack in your pocket
- See yourself sitting on the front porch smoking, while you look out at the people in the park across the street - walking, enjoying the air and engaging with life. Feel what that feels like when it's you who wants to be out there and not sitting here
- Remember the feeling of separation that is present when you smoke - separation from the flow of life around you and within you
- Remember how much time you have spent smoking when you could be creating, dancing, connecting
- Remember how long you have struggled to get here, and how much, how badly you want to end this battle inside you
- Remember that this is a good way to show all the precious parts of yourself that you are strong enough and responsible enough to care for them, and that everything you need is already inside of you. The props, the crutches...we don't need them any more, because I can stand on my own two feet. Show them that they can trust you. By attending to your emotions, you attend to each of them.
- Remember that these parts of you who are angry and scared, need to be heard. They need your help in understanding that that you are no longer a child, and that you know what's best
- Remember that when the cravings come, that's all they are. Just like the strength training you are doing with your body; this training is with your mind (you have done this before and you know just how strong you are capable of being). Each craving you ride is a wave that will ebb and flow. the craving will end
I know you can do this. I believe in you. Trust in yourself, and trust in life to see you through every moment. Look back on your life if you need proof, and look forward for inspiration. And most of all, remember that each and every present moment - in each thing you take for granted, there is someone else out there who is fighting for their life to have or experience that very thing. Celebrate and appreciate this life you've been give to live - this breath, this freedom, this movement, this very Life itself.
I love you Jen - now, before, and always.