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My journey, Why I quit smoking this time Cancel The title field is required!

1. smitty

   

   98 posts
   Registered:
   12 Jul 2018
   12 Jul 2018

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   This is my first day back to SHO, but I am no stranger to this site, I have been around SHO for around twenty years, I have struggled time and time again with staying smoke free, the longest I ever got was almost 8 years, I am not going to dwell on the past, it is gone, forever gone, instead I want to reflect on why I started smoking again, and what I am going to do to stay away from that dirty little demon. Each and every time I started back to smoking was because of my arrogance and pride in thinking that I had this addiction conquered, I got tired of my quit, in the back of my mind I missed it, I use to love having a smoke first thing in the morning and after meals, this time when I quit I vowed that there was nothing going to stand in my way, the reason I failed was because I allow my weight to become a big issue,I think that this is a issue for every single person that makes a decision to put down the smokes for good and it will eventually effect every single person that makes a decision to put down the cigarettes for good.
   
   Next to quitting weight gain is the second hardest thing to control every single time I quit weight gain has been a contributing factor as to why I started again. When I quit this time I made a decision that my weight was not going to be an issue. Weight gain is a pretty sensitive issue to me, mainly because I have had an awful time with it, that, I am in a wheelchair today because of my knees, both of my knees have been replaced,  the doctors say that my weight has something to do with it, that and the fact that I am diabetic. I was already allot heavier then I quit this time, 4 months have gone by pretty quick, at this point I don't know if ive lost or gained weight, but i really don't care, there will be time to lose weight once I feel confident with my quit again. This time I wanted to choose a quit date that meant something to me, so I quit on my birthday, May 4 2018, I figure it will last longer, the real cool part is that my sister quit 2 weeks before me, so I have an accountability partner, I love it, I look so forward to getting to know you guys, I guess you could say that your the next generation of quitters, blessings everyony
   

   Last modified on 12 Jul 2018 19:26 by smitty
2. marianne, quit coach

   

   278 posts
   Registered:
   30 Nov 2017
   12 Jul 2018

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   Hello Smitty,
   
   Thank you for sharing about your past journey of up to 8 years without smoking.  Like you said, no sense to look back dwell yet the reflection is so beneficial. 
   
   Be very proud of yourself that you have a strong focus.  And we stand behind you believing that as have made the decision to quit smoking other behavioural changes will come in due time. 
   
   We know you and your sister together along with the support you have from members here will go a long way!   
   
   Please feel free to share your day to day barriers or concerns as we want to support you in any way we can.  
   
   Marianne
3. smitty

   

   98 posts
   Registered:
   12 Jul 2018
   12 Jul 2018 in reply to marianne, quit coach

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   Still here eh Marianne, my jouney goes far beyond then the words I spoke here today, my left knee got badly infected last New Years and was hospitalized until March on antibiotics, and even then it didn't dawn on me that smoking might have something to do with why I was sick, I almost lost my leg because of my stupidity
4. brieffree

   

   1478 posts
   Registered:
   28 Nov 2017
   13 Jul 2018 in reply to smitty

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   Hi Smitty
   
   Was really truly experience and you have more than health reason to quit for good. I think we all have our reason, the main part is to try, no matter what to change for the better!
   Better choices!
   
   You share that you quit before, so you know how make a plan to stay free!
   
   Smoking does not help in anyway! Give your self an other chance! You can do it!
   
5. mdjsunshine

   

   48 posts
   Registered:
   30 Nov 2017
   14 Jul 2018 in reply to smitty

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   Hey smitty we always return !!!  i am so glad that you have hopped back on board and having michele is awesome !!  you can do this my dear friend - i know you can and so do you deep down.  the wheelchair sucks but as you said about the infection and possible link to smoking i was told point blank the day they put me at the top of the list for leg amputation that i owed my infection in my whole leg to that old demon and the 4 packs of cigarettes i was stuffing in my mouth.  i spent a week on the amputation list and then they got another bright idea.  oh lord i still pray every day that they would have taken my leg.  i may not ever walk again but by god i know with all my heart and soul that i will never put a cigarette in my mouth again.  god speed to you my dear friend and we will be buddies like before with your sister.  i am loving it already :d

   
   

   Last modified on 17 Jul 2018 21:09 by Missing user
6. jenna lee, quit coach

   

   265 posts
   Registered:
   28 Jun 2018
   15 Jul 2018

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   Welcome back Smitty,
   
   So sorry to hear about your struggles, and so inspired by your determination to keep trying to persevere with your goals. 
   
   You have great strategies here. You are reflecting back on the past reasons for relapse (over confidence, weight gain, missing smoking)  in order to prevent relapse in the future. You have also identified triggers (mornings, after meals, enjoyment), which works in your favour when quit planning too.
   
   Although your post does identify your struggles, it also identifies your strengths: you have support from us and your sister, you are self-aware, you have had quit attempts in the past (long ones too), you set a quit date...
   
   So many other can relate to your experience, including others who have replied here.
   
   We are excited to know about your progress,
   
   Jenna Lee,
   
   
7. adream01

   

   25 posts
   Registered:
   12 Jul 2018
   16 Jul 2018

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   Mdsunshine, and Smitty, 
   
   Ive been reading over the Forums and I must say you both should be so proud for quitting and having the courage and strength to quit! This site is very supportive and understanding. 
   
   Last Tuesday I decided that that was it! Till this morning on my way to work first stop gas station I knew they would have my brand!
   
   My reasons- I lost both my parents to heart disease.My father was in his 70s and my mother early 80s  The weekend before last my nephew who is the same age as me  had to have his heart shocked to get it back to normal rhythm..he's been experiencing shortness of breath.....now he is on heart medication on top of being diabetic. I can count my blessing and give thanks to body that I've occasionally abused over the years has treated me so well. I feel very lucky to say I just have fluctuating blood pressure. After my separation two years ago August I've went from a pack nearly everyday to two packs a week. Yes, I  have gained 30 lbs over the course of two years and feeling really bad that I worked so hard at losing the weight from being on Weight Watchers to have gained it all back. But I know, I must "focus on the process not the results" Recreating myself and that girl is a none smoker..... After having that cigarette this morning I know I can kid myself but not my body. I've been reading over the Forums, did a quiz to how addicted I am....this is a journey and I'm learning more about myself and the addiction of cigarettes.Thank you Smokershelpline and all the wonderful people who post  <3  Stay strong 
8. eagerquit

   

   415 posts
   Registered:
   07 Mar 2018
   16 Jul 2018 in reply to adream01

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   Hi adream01,
   
   I was saddened to hear of your family losses and the near loss of your nephew. It has been a very difficult period for you. It sounds like you gained a valuable lesson from that cigarette you had this morning, and that is very important. The forums are certainly a treasure trove of information on the addiction to nicotine and successful quits. Self awareness is a big bonus from the experience.
   
   Stay with your quit. You are worth it.
   
   Eagerquit
   
9. adream01

   

   25 posts
   Registered:
   12 Jul 2018
   16 Jul 2018 in reply to eagerquit

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   Good evening Eagerquit, 
    
   Yes I'm learning valuable lessons here and reading other peoples stories is inspirational and leavings you feeling your not alone. 
   
   Thank you for your kind words and encouragment
   
   adream01 
10. aurora

    

    94 posts
    Registered:
    08 Mar 2018
    22 Jul 2018

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    Hi Smitty,
    Thanks for sharing why you quit this time, and some of the big pitfalls to staying smoke free.
    I will take your words of wisdom with me on this quit - I have quit many times, sometimes for years, only to start again.  This time, I am wiser and determined, and your story helps me to keep strong and inspired. 
    
    

11. treepeo

    

    832 posts
    Registered:
    29 Nov 2017
    25 Jul 2018

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    Hi smitty,
    
    I am glad to hear you are quitting again after having relapsed.  That takes guts and determination, and I applaud you for giving it another shot.
    
    Man, do I ever agree with you.  We can never be complacent, because this stupid addiction has a way of attacking when we least expect it.  I have been a non-smoker for the past 19 months, but I still get the odd craving, and the odd want.  I don't get it.  I love being a non-smoker, so why do I still get these feelings?  These cravings?  It is so frustrating.  In my heart, I think I will always be tempted from time to time.  I just have to stay strong no matter what.  We all have to stay strong.
    
    Keep posting here, smitty, because we are stronger together.  We all need to keep helping each other through this process.  You have quit before, and you can quit again.  Remember, you deserve to live a healthier life.  You deserve to live a life of freedom from this deadly addiction.  Believe in yourself.  We are all rooting for you!
12. smitty

    

    98 posts
    Registered:
    12 Jul 2018
    17 Aug 2018

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    Treepeo, man can I ever relate to what your saying, believe it or not I was 8 years and was still getting cravings, you will never be totally free from cravings, that I know for a fact now, my dad is 30+years smokefree and he still gets cravings, I love being a non-smoker, there is so much freedom in waking up in the morning and not having that demon at my feet, today he is under my feet, and by Gods grace, there he will stay,maybe I am more focused, and more determined, but Im not getting craving lately, I guess I'm doing something right this time, I just pray for continued success
13. treepeo

    

    832 posts
    Registered:
    29 Nov 2017
    18 Aug 2018

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    You know what, Smitty?  One of my brothers said that about 10 years after he had quit, he was talking to a friend, and while they were talking my brother reached into his shirt pocket for a cigarette.  And then he realized what he was doing.  10 years later and still reaching out of a long lost habit, but a stubborn one!
    
    Well for me, I didn't need to keep my hands busy, and it was not a tactile thing.  It was mainly all about my lungs.  They wanted that smoke, and that was the hardest habit for me to break.  My cravings drove me through the roof, and at some points, I thought something bad might happen to me because my lungs were throbbing so badly.  I actually thought I might have heart failure because the throbbing in my lungs was so bad, and I wasn't sure if my body could take the strain.  When I think back on the beginning of my quit and what I went through, it makes me so sad.  This addiction can bring us to our knees.  Talk about a humbling experience.
    
    The good news is that I stayed strong.  I was really determined to do it this time, and this website and the people here were invaluable in helping me achieve my goal. And although I love being a non-smoker, you are right.  I think at least some of us will always get cravings from time to time that we have to resist.  It's not just a want, although I have those too.  I actually have physical cravings that I have to fight against.  They don't happen very often, and they don't usually last long.  But holy cow, it makes me so mad that I still have to fight this battle.  But oh well, I guess that's the way it is and will always be.
    
    So, the point is, we have to stay vigilant no matter what.  We can never be complacent, never get ahead of ourselves.  We have to remember, a little bit of pain for a lifetime of gain.  And NOPE, Not One Puff Ever.  If we never take that first puff, we will remain non-smokers, and we will honour all of the hard work and commitment we went through to get to where we want to be.
    
    Stay the course, everyone.  We can all do this!